My thoughts run free here...

Monday, January 11, 2010

Tough choice.... Feeling down...

Sigh... Now I have to drop my MNO1001 Management and Organisation module so that I can take LAH2201 Hindi 2... I really wanted both the modules, but they are clashing, so I had to choose one. I chose Hindi, although I wanted MNO1001 since my first year.

I oddly feel so lonely nowadays... It has been ages since I've gone out with my friends. Why am I feeling like this? Not only that, but I also feel I have no friends who understand me fully. I am not saying that they have not been good friends. But just that I want to have a friend who understands me better than anyone else. Someone with whom I can relate to very well, and share my feelings with without any restrictions.

You know sometimes this kind of friend can even be a stranger. It is funny, but sometimes with a stranger you can be very free and outspoken, especially because you have no expectations from him/her. It is an odd feeling. I know this but I have not experienced this.

I don't know why I am feeling this way. I have to get used to my loneliness and to the fact that there is only me who understands me better than anyone else. Or I should say there is only God who understands me better than anyone else. And I happy with this.

2 comments:

Sathej said...

Hmm..true, Priya. Have felt like that several times - needing someone to understand me better. And yes, ironically enough, strangers sometimes help! Have gone through this. Sometimes have confided many things to a stranger and later felt odd myself ! But yes, it helps, possibly because as you say, we have no 'expectations' of him/her. While with clost friends, we unkowingly expect things..

Anyway, wish you get out of the loneliness soon..

Sathej

Priya said...

Thanks Sathej! But this feeling, I don't wish that anyone will experience it. Or if they HAVE to, then let them experience for a short period of time only... Because I don't like this feeling at all!! I don't want it! I am trying my very best to get out of this feeling of insecurity (as we can call it).

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