--Wynand asked:
“Howard, have you ever been in love?”
Roark turned to look straight at him and answer quietly:
“I still am.”
“But when you walk through a building, what you feel is greater than that?”
“Much greater, Gail.”
“I was thinking of people who say that happiness is impossible on earth. Look how hard they all try to find some joy in life. Look how they struggle for it. Why should any living creature exist in pain? By what conceivable right can anyone demand that a human being exist for anything but for his own joy? Every one of them wants it. Every part of him wants it. But they never find it. I wonder why. They whine and say they don’t understand the meaning of life. There’s a particular kind of people that I despise. Those who seek some sort of a higher purpose or ‘universal goal.’ Who don’t know what to live for, who moan that they must ‘find themselves.’ You hear it all around us. That seems to be the official bromide of our century. Every book you open. Every drooling self-confession. It seems to the noble thing to confess. I’d think it would be the most shameful one.”
“Look, Gail.” Roark got up, reached out, tore a thick branch off a tree, held it in both hands, one fist closed at each end; then, his wrists and knuckles tensed against the resistance, he bent the branch slowly into an arc. “Now I can make what I want of it: a bow, a spear, a cane, a railing. That’s the meaning of life.”
“Your strength?”
“Your work.” He tossed the branch aside. “The material earth offers you and what you make out of it…”-- The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand

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Update pls...

It has really been a long time since I blogged. But all this while I have been having a good time with my family, friends and myself. I have done some soul-searching and have found out a lot about me. I'm really happy and content within me. Reading and listening to Osho has given me that insight of his.

I'm going to India again this June! To Chennai through SQ and then to Salem! We're going to do our home-warming for the house that my father was building. It's complete now and we're very happy. The name of the house is going to be "Haripriyas". Haha:) The first is my sister's name and the next is mine! It's lovely, but we had other names in mind. Like "Geetha Illam", my mother's name. But it sounded like a refugee house or something. Then my dad was making fun like naming it "Geetha Gugai (Cave)":)) Anyway, it's "Haripriyas".

This time the trip is going to be fun because I'm also attending my cousin brother's wedding! They are rich people and so their wedding function is bound to be grand. I feel so excited right now to go India. I'm also anxious about my university application. I'm not worried about the scholarship ones, I don't need them anyway. I know I'll get admission to the science faculty. But still I'm excited to see that in words from the university itself.

Anyway, what am I doing here blogging crap, nothing useful? It's my blog, does it have to be useful or beneficial to anyone in particular? No! Why do people blog anyway? Sometimes it's a nuisance to maintain a blog just for your friends to see. Sometimes we just use it to show off. Sometimes it's just relaxing to sit and rant all you want. For me, it's a journey of revelation. I blog solely for the purpose of meeting people online and to make friends with them. If friends come my way to talk with me and read my blog, I will be glad and happy. If they don't, I'll still be happy to be given the chance to blog.

There is a meditation technique that buddha teaches to his disciples. It's really a very good technique. Just disconnect yourself from everything and everyone. You are no longer a son, a daughter, an officer, a doctor, a hindu, a friend, a man or a woman. Just disconnect yourself and see what is left of you. Then ask yourself who you are. An answer will come, but just disconnect from that too. Then ask yourself again. Then you will realise that no answer comes out of you. This is what you really are. Just be a nobody and you will come to like yourself, to love your aloneness.

I like to remain like a nobody forever. But identity has become an innate part of ourselves that we have to be somebody. No matter who I am and will be in this life, I definitely don't want to be a 'wife'. The tasks that come with that status, are something that I definitely don't want to do at all. I don't need to in the first place. I will never wash his laundry, cook his meals or bear and rear his children. NEVER! I'll never be a good wife, not to mention a wife!

But now that doesn't mean I'll never marry. I have to marry! Atleast that is what the society wants. The society or for that matter our own parents don't really care about what we kids really want. To them, we are just kids, innocent and know nothing. But they know. They know that we need to get married to a good person and they think that that will end their line of duties supposed to be performed.

I'll marry. One day, I will and have to. But not to become a wife.

Oh btw, I'll not tell who the baby is supposed to be until someone guesses it correctly. I'm expecting the first person to be correct and I hope so. I know so:)

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Guess Who?

Hi people. It's been a long time since I blogged. I've been quite busy lately. But enjoying too. Now let's see. Guess who is this in these pictures?

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Anti-smoking ad

Look at this gruesome anti-smoking ad. There are even worser ads around. But I just chose this one. It is scary for any first-timers and non-smokers. But definetely not scary for the most of us. I could only find the Australian version. There's a Singaporean version too. When do these people ever learn that such ads seriously don't help?

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My best friends

It's me, Kasturi and Kalpana. My best friends. Hoping that they are doing well in their teaching job:) All the best jaans!

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What the F*CK?

Man, I'm starting to love this person. Haha:)

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The Big B

It feels like it has been ages since I've updated this blog. It's time for me to fill up loads of application forms and scholarship forms. It's not hard to make any decisions 'cause I know where to go. I've applied for three scholarships so far: CAAS, Firefly and NUS Undergraduate Scholarship. I'm not so confident with the latter because it's highly competitive and there are so many of them better than me academically and aesthetically. So, I'm trying my chances with them. I've applied for two of the local universities: NUS and NTU. To the faculty of science of course.

I know I'm taking a risk by choosing the field of Life Sciences. This is because there is a big biomedical debate going on in Singapore. Moreover, local graduates and PhD pursuers and holders are few compared to foreigners. Most of the local A*STAR scholars do not stay in Singapore at all. They fly off to UK or US looking out for better opportunities and better paying jobs as researchers, not having the idea of returning home. Whatmore, the government might stop funding the Biopolis research agencies and that will be the end of the research era in Singapore. While it is now being called the Biomedical Hub of Southeast Asia, I have little doubt whether the name will continue to stay.

However, I believe I'm making the right choice, by sticking towards my interests. I definitely wouldn't want to take a measly pay of three or four thousand after my PhD. But research has become my interest. In which field is a question that would have to wait. Anything might happen in these four years' of study.

This is a picture taken while my colleagues and I went to Swenson's to have dinner. Fara, the one on the left wearing pink shirt, had just got her PhD. So this is a treat from her for all of us in the WH lab.
















PS: Thought I was going to write about the big 'B'? Haha:)

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Thinking about...

I feel very moody. Might be due to PMS. So I didn't feel like updating my blog. I was also quite busy with work and other stuff. I'm also thinking about which course to choose. Although I'm clear about what I want, I still have some doubts. I'm expecting to clear them when I go to their open house today afternoon. I have Life Sciences and Computational Biology in mind.

I have so far noticed what are the disadvantages of the career in life sciences as a researcher. You don't paid so high, in the first place. You have to get a PhD to get well paid. You have publish papers to get your name well-recognised. There is a lot of waiting time while you're doing research. The research itself takes a long time, to see the results and analyse them. But it's good to know what I'm getting into. Despite all these disadvantages, I like research.

I don't think I'll be in this field for a long time too. Probably after my PhD, I might take up another career, maybe as a lecturer in my field. I also want to become a writer some day. I have a lot of dreams and how many of them are going to come true, I don't know. If I put my hardwork and a bit of luck on my side, I can achieve my dreams.

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My favourite series

Harry Potter is probably the most imaginative story I've ever read. It's a wonderful story. I will get very engrossed in it. Like now. I'm reading the fifth book for the umpteenth time, to update myself of the things and details I've forgotten, before the movie gets released in July. Oh what a long wait. I think I'll probably do a podcast on Harry Potter books to satisfy the kind of feelings I have for the story. Never have I felt so many emotions for a book and it's story. I've literally fallen in love with Sirius and Lupin, and hate Snape to the core.

I'm waiting for the movie and the last book in the series. The suspense is killing me already. I love JK Rowling's works and her imaginative brain. The first time I read the first book, it was really boring. But I persisted. I kept reading on. And then came the interesting part. So continued reading all the books until book 4. I don't want to put everything here. I want to do a podcast on it. So let's see...

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A'Level Results...

A'level results are released today... I'm really scared and nervous from head to toe. It'll determine what kind of course I'll get in Uni.

But let's put that aside. Who can change what I've done a few months ago. But I'll update the blog with my results later today.

This year has so far been very good for me. The first times I had are numerous. First time I'm in a job, first time I went out late with friends on my own, first time went to a bar and drank beer (which I'll never do again, yuk yuk!!), first time I highlighted my hair, first time I tried beef (was also a little yuk), first time I... It's just a lot to say right here. But I'm happy I tried new things and yet to try more. My mind is stuck on the prospect of results. So I'll become happy/sad later. Paakalaam...

Update: I'm happy with my results!! Phew! Okay here they are:

General Paper A2
Physics B
Chem, Bio, Math A

I was interviewed by Tamil Murasu newspaper, with my other Indian friends who also did well. I also gave a phone interview for the local tamil fm 96.8. My interview was telecasted on the radio, but I didn't get to listen to it:( But a my parents did, that's enough! Let's see whether our photo comes on paper tomorrow. I'm happy:D At last the agony of waiting is over.

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